Focus on what is under your control

The world today is challenging all of us. For most of us in the United States, we are accustomed to being able to do what we want, go where we want, and live in any fashion that we choose. By standards of yesteryear and even many countries today, we live in luxury. And, most people here have never experienced restrictions on our freedom. Now, we are facing a time where restrictions limit us. In that light, each of us must focus on what we can control.

 

The Great Depression & WWII

 

The last time there were significant nationwide restrictions on Americans was during World War II. Most of the people that experienced the days of the Great Depression and WWII are no longer with us. Only the few remaining members of the Greatest Generation remember those days. It is from them that we can get some perspective on the situation we are facing today.

 

Availability of Items

 

The challenges of the Great Depression and WWII were different than the challenge we face today. Still, there are some commonalities. During the 1930s and 1940s, the government rationed items because we could not get items, such as, sugar and coffee in a big enough supply for everyone to have as much as they desired. Other items, such as, shoes were rationed to save materials for the war. An important factor is that this wasn’t for a couple of months. These restrictions went on for several years, although some were eased over time.

 

Today items, such as, toilet paper and hand sanitizer are difficult to find in stores. However, the reasons are different. It isn’t that we can’t get materials to make them or that they are needed for another reason. Instead, they are scarce because of panic buying and in some cases hoarding with the idea of profiting off of the situation.

 

The availability of most items should return to normal shortly as people see that supplies are replenished and opportunists find that selling these items more difficult than they imagined due to rules put in place by online marketplaces. To assist with the situation, stores have begun rationing the number of some items that an individual can purchase at a given time until people return to normal purchasing patterns.

 

You can’t control what is on the shelves, but you can ensure that you buy only what you need. Perhaps consider a few extra items so that you have to shop less often, but don’t over do it. Consider how long it will take you to use the items you purchase. The less we all panic buy, the less likely we will have new restrictions on our freedom to purchase items of our choosing.

 

Restaurants and Bars

 

During the war, restaurants stayed open in most areas. However, some had limited hours. Likewise, in some areas nightlife was put on hold by local governments. The reasoning being that it was wrong for people to have fun while our soldiers were risking their lives. Yet, theaters were still open and people did get a burger and fries now and then.

 

Today, restaurants and bars are closed or have limited take-out and delivery services not because it wouldn’t look right, but instead to curb the transmission of COVID-19. One huge difference is that today people eat out far more than they did 80 years ago.

 

Eating out is a habit and some people do it daily. Thus, it seems like a much bigger issue to most people today than it was in 1940. This restriction on our freedom seems to some as overwhelming. If you are one of them, I recommend learning to cook (if you don’t know how), spending time with your family, learning about something you are interested in, or doing some other home activity that you enjoy. If you are an extrovert, talk on the phone, have group chats, email, message, and use social media sites to stay in contact.

 

Businesses

 

Already gyms, restaurants, museums, theaters, and other businesses have had their doors closed or their business greatly altered by government rules. Additionally, there are rumors that some businesses will be asked (or told) to convert to making medical supplies. This type of thing did happen during WWII. Businesses had no choice. The government told them what they would be making and the timeline they had to make it.

 

We aren’t accustomed to the government dictating the closure of businesses or what businesses can and cannot do. However, the longer this outbreak goes on, the more likely business decisions will be controlled by the government. Still, it doesn’t mean that it will be forever. As WWII ramped down, businesses returned to making the products they had made before the war almost overnight. In some cases, the first new civilian products rolled off the assembly lines the same day the restriction was lifted.

 

Travel Restrictions

 

People travel much more today than they did in the 1930s and 1940s. People fly at the drop of a hat, cruise on the oceans, and drive across the country without it being a big deal. It was just a part of life up until the last few weeks when travel restrictions started being put in place.

 

Travel restrictions today are a bit different than during WWII. During WWII, people weren’t technically restricted from travel. However, gas rationing made it nearly impossible to travel. And, if you blew a tire, you probably weren’t getting a new one for a long time, as they required government approval to purchase. Likewise, you had to have government approval to purchase a car or a tractor. Fortunately, we haven’t reached that point.

 

Travel may be greatly restricted right now. So, what can we do? Travel online. Research places that you would like to someday visit, find museum collections online, share stories of previous travel, etc. Use technology to bring travel and exotic places into your life.

 

Focus On What We Can Control

 

The government may control many aspects of life, however, they don’t control everything. Thus, it is important for each of us to focus on what we can control. We cannot control that we can’t hang out at our favorite restaurant. However, if we can afford it, we can still order take out. We can also experiment with making new kinds of food, try new hobbies, etc.

 

We don’t have to allow restrictions on our freedoms to lead to negative thinking. By focusing on what is under your control, we will keep a positive mindset and make it through this situation better people than we were before. We have the Greatest Generation as our role model. Make them proud.

 

Join us March 26 as we discuss Being In Control In Uncertain Times.  The event is FREE.

 

 

Connecting to Gratitude

Connecting to gratitude is one of the keys to healing, happiness, and moving forward. Although it sounds simple, it is often overlooked and sometimes quite challenging.

 

The Easy Stuff

 

It is easy to find good in many things. For instance, having a place to live and food to eat are both good. However, often people take these things for granted or simply accept them without gratitude.

 

The first step in connecting with gratitude is to start seeing these obviously good things as blessings. Prayer, meditation, notes of gratitude, or any other gratitude ritual will help create the connection to gratitude.

 

The Challenge

 

But, what about the bad things in life? Extra work is required to search for something positive worthy of gratitude when considering something that is overall bad. The reason is simple. Being in an emotionally abusive relationship, losing a job, and having an illness rarely have an obvious reason for gratitude. However, connecting to gratitude is very important. Without doing so, truly moving forward is next to impossible.

 

Learning that these experiences have made you who you are is very important to conquering this challenge. Except in cases where a person loathes themselves, it helps a person gain an understanding that value can come in many packages. To take that next step forward, it is critical to be able to give gratitude for those experiences, no matter how negative the situation.

 

Looking For The Light

 

Sometimes it takes a lot of searching to find light in something bad. One way to look at something bad is to look at what good has happened because of the bad situation. For instance, perhaps you wouldn’t have met a certain person, moved to a new city, or looked for a different job if the bad situation hadn’t happened.

 

For example, when I was a senior in college, a company interviewed me and wanted to hire me. The problem was that because of things going on in their industry they were not allowed to hire anyone. Now, this company was ideal for me. It paid well, had previously hired a lot of people from my college, and their offices where only a couple of hours away from my family.

 

It wasn’t something terribly bad, but definitely not good either. Fortunately, at the time, I just accepted it as fact and looked at other options. In retrospect, I am grateful that it didn’t work out. If they had been hiring, I likely wouldn’t have pursued working for Bell Labs. Thus, I likely wouldn’t have ended up living in Denver and I would never have met my husband.

 

People have situations that are much worse than the one I recounted. However, there is almost always something for which to be grateful.

 

Letting Go

 

If you are really struggling with finding good about something, it is likely that there are things that you need to let go. Perhaps you haven’t fully let go of a bad relationship or you keep ties to people at a company where you had an awful experience. In these cases, you need to ask if these continued relationships are serving you.

 

The same can be asked of objects that you choose to keep. If they are a reminder of something negative, ask yourself if you need them in your life today.

 

Additionally, you may continue to have an emotional attachment to the situation – no matter how bad it was. Anger, frustration, and even love can continue to hold you to the situation.

 

Once these emotions and other connections to bad situations have been resolved, you will be able to see beyond the negative. At that point, you can see that you became stronger, that your new job really is better for you, or something positive did come from the situation.

 

It can be very difficult to reach the point of being able to find gratitude for something related to a bad situation. After all, it is all very personal to you.

 

Forgiveness is Key

 

One of the keys to being able to express gratitude in negative situations is to forgive those involved in the bad situation. Once you truly forgive them, you can find light in what happened.

 

This shouldn’t be confused with justifying what happened or forgetting what happened. Neither should it be forgiving the person for their benefit. All of these are unhealthy actions. Instead, it should be forgiving for your benefit. To make you healthy. To make you whole.

 

Connecting to Gratitude

 

Start expressing gratitude for the little things and the things that you normally take for granted. Once you are able, express gratitude for the light in the bad things. The more you express gratitude for the light in all things; the more positive things will come your way.

 

If you would like assistance moving toward gratitude, we offer private sessions Forgiving and Releasing that will help you on your way.  Additionally, we offer a group event The Power of Forgiveness.

 

 

Ivory Tower

 

 

Although originally used to reference the isolated life of a poet, the term “ivory tower” has come to be a reference to someone who is not in touch with the real world. In some references, it goes so farther.  In those instances, it indicates  that the person has a complete disregard for lowly real world issues.

 

People who speak about something or someone at a distance,  are often seen as living in an ivory tower.  Those close to the issue often feel that the perspective shared is out of touch with their own personal reality. The more distantly removed one person is from another in terms of geographical distance, cultural distance, economic distance, and educational distance, the more challenging it is to communicate without one person sounding out of touch with the other.

 

In Academia

 

Often the term ivory tower is used to refer to people in academia because they are focused on research and theories. Meanwhile, people actually working in the field are dealing with the realities of the real world.

 

Along these lines, I recall a researcher at the company where I worked who was advising a PhD candidate at one of the Ivy League schools. The corporate researcher was excited about the PhD student’s thesis and wanted to share information about it with me. I am not sure exactly how I reacted, but it was something along the lines of “And, what else?” They were shocked to know that I already “knew” that the PhD student’s hypothesis was true. I politely informed them that it was common knowledge in business, particularly high tech. It would never have occurred to me to try to get a PhD on something that was so obvious in my world. Yet, here was someone from academia doing just that.

 

In Business

 

Business has plenty of its own ivory towers that aren’t focused on research.  One of the most common ivory towers is retail corporate headquarters. On many occasions I have commented to a store employee about recent changes that made little sense. They almost always answer, “It doesn’t make sense to us either.”  Then the employee shares that someone at headquarters made the decision and that they have no choice.   It makes me wonder if the people at headquarters actually ever shop in their stores.

 

Personally, I like to see and select products in person. However, it is often easier online because finding the product in the store can be a hunting expedition. For instance, who would ever think to look for the dish-washing products in the section with animal care and food? If you would, please explain the logic to me. I am sure it is not in that section online.

 

Other kinds of businesses have ivory towers as well. The executives often believe products can be created much faster than possible. They just have no knowledge of what goes into product creation, but demand it all the same.  

 

Similarly, they will cut costs and staff at any turn while they jet around the world staying in luxury accommodations and eating fine meals. It is challenging for employees to see a connection to these executives. 

 

Elections

 

The ivory tower comes into play in elections as well. In a local election, the candidates are usually from the same area as voters and likely have similar experiences as the voters. Likewise, the candidate is either of the same culture as voters or at least has an understanding of the culture of the voters. Some situations may exist where voters view local candidates as living in an ivory tower. However, it is rarer than in a national election where there is more distance.

 

The further from home the elected official serves; the more likely they are to be seen as living in an ivory tower. This is somewhat unavoidable as the larger the group that they serve, the harder it is to relate to the group. Thus, members of Congress are challenged to represent all of their constituents. The President has an even bigger challenge to connect to the general population.

 

The Facade

 

Some people in these positions are really good at getting common people to believe that they understand the life of the factory worker, the farmer, the front line employee, or the person living in the inner city. Most of the time, this is a façade. Thus, it is important to look beyond it to see if even at a high level the person understands or if their eloquent speech is simply winning you over.

 

Breaking Out Of The Tower

 

Now, it is possible for all people who live in ivory towers to become more attuned to the real world. The first step is for them to realize that they have a lack of understanding. Until they give up the idea that they “know,” they will not make progress. Believing that one knows is not the same as having true understanding. And, when there is a lack of understanding, there is a disconnect.

 

To be successful at connecting to a broad set of people, executives, researchers, and elected officials need to reach beyond their circle of influence. They need to reach out to people in all types of positions and from all kinds of backgrounds. For instance, a politician can only truly connect with the people when he or she reaches out and, more importantly, listens to people of all political leanings. Likewise, a truly successful executive will listen to employees at every level and in a variety of jobs.

 

Listening & Understanding

 

Break out of your world and into the world of someone else by listening and really trying to understand. It is through that understanding that you can truly connect. With true connections, people can come together.

 

 

 

Hidden Connections

 

 

Have you tried finding a connection between yourself and each of the people that cross your path during the day? It is interesting to contemplate. At this point, some people may jump to the concept of six-degrees of separation. However, what I have in mind is a bit different.

 

Zero-Degrees of Separation

 

I contend that there is some type of connection between each person and every other person – no matter how completely different the two people are. These connections are sometimes obvious. For instance, two people might have the same educational background, be from the same town, or have the same religious beliefs. Other times, it is more of a challenge to find the connection.

 

Recently, I was considering my connection to various public political figures. For some of them, I could easily see a connection, since I knew we shared a similar opinion on a particular topic. For others, finding the connection was a bit more challenging. I started thinking about the person’s personality, values, background, interests, and experiences compared to my own.

 

Using this scope, I was able to identify at least one “connection” between the person and myself. I am sure there are many more connections I could make with each person if I got to know them.

 

 

Hidden Connections

 

It is not always easy to find connections between yourself and others, especially if you really don’t want to see it. Most of us don’t have a strong desire to find a connection between ourselves and Jack the Ripper or Al Capone. Still, if we took the time to look, we would find a connection. Similarly, we would find a connection with people who live in different parts of the world, have different religions, or live in very different circumstances.

 

Authenticity

 

Although I would challenge you to find a connection to even the seemingly most different person, I would also caution you to pay attention to the authenticity of the connection. For example, political candidates may state an opinion that aligns well with your own perspective. You should consider that connection carefully.

 

First, look at your own opinion and make sure it is something you truly own. Often the opinions we have are those that we believe we should have rather than our true beliefs. Second, consider the same for the candidate. Is their stated opinion really their opinion and the direction they will take if faced with questions on the topic or is it simply what they believe people want to hear. You may even find that you have a connection with someone who states a different opinion than yours because their underlying viewpoint and resulting actions may actually match your perspective.

 

Limitations

 

It is important not to be drawn in by someone’s outward statements if they are not authentic. The Benders are infamous for inviting people into their home for a nice meal, killing them, and dumping them in a field. I am sure that many of their victims initially felt a connection to them believing they were nice folks that were providing a meal to a weary traveler.  Yet, in their case, it was all a scheme to get the victims’ valuables.

 

Therefore, it is important to remember that connections must be authentic. When you consider public personalities or people that cross your path, make sure to look for the connection. They may be on a different path than you, but challenge yourself to find something you authentically have in common. Just be diligent and pay attention so you don’t become a victim of the person behind the curtain.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Whether you follow sports or not, most people are aware that some teams have a way of connecting with fans that other teams do not. For instance, the Dallas Cowboys of the NFL, the Kansas (KU) Jayhawks men’s basketball team, and the Boston Red Socks baseball team are well known for having large fan bases. These fans come out to support them through thick and thin.

 

Signs Of A True Connection

 

The reason for the strong fan base transcends their win-loss record. For instance, the Cowboys have been very inconsistent over the years. They have had great years and lousy years. Yet, their fans stick with them. Since their current stadium was completed in 2009, they have averaged approximately 90,000 attendees per game despite having a winning record in only about half the years.

 

In contrast, the Washington Redskins of the NFL, who had mixed results and a bit more on the downside, dropped from an average attendance in 2010 of ~83,000 to ~61,000 in 2018. Clearly, their fans do not have the same kind of allegiance to the team that the Cowboys’ fans have.

 

The Winning Connection

 

So, what is the secret for these teams? Is it that they have had winning seasons? Well, it is true that all three teams have had many winning seasons, The Red Socks have won 9 world championships over ~120 years. The Cowboys have appeared in 8 championship games and won 5 over their 60 years of existence. Likewise, the KU men’s basketball has won their conference championship 61 times in just over 120 years with multiple NCAA championships. They also have the longest current NCAA tournament appearance streak having being selected for 30 years straight.

 

So, winning likely helps. However, there are other teams with a tradition of winning that don’t have the same following. Consider the recent Super Bowl featuring the Kansas City Chiefs and the San Francisco 49ers. Kansas City was the #1 TV viewing market for the game with 97% of televisions that were on tuned into the game. San Francisco was not among the top 10 markets for the game. San Francisco had won more Super Bowls than Kansas City, but neither team had won in recent years. Yet, Kansas City had a stronger fan base.

 

But, There Is More

 

For two teams to have such a disparity in viewership when playing in the big game indicates that Kansas City has a stronger following than San Francisco. Thus, a connection to fans must be based on more than a winning tradition.

 

Let’s consider other traditions and ways that teams connect with their fans. If you look at the Kansas Jayhawks, they have a huge number of basketball traditions and other characteristics that make them appealing. The person who originated the game of basketball coached at KU. They also have a unique mascot and chant. Both are memorable and rated among the best in college sports. They also teach new students the college traditions, which help maintain those traditions over time. In addition, they are known for their amazing atmosphere at Allen Field House, which holds the record for the loudest indoor sports arena at 130.4 decibels.

 

The Red Sox and the Cowboys also have their traditions. The Red Sox have the Fenway Frank, music traditions and more. Likewise, the Cowboys are known for their Cheerleaders and playing on Thanksgiving every year. Additionally, most teams with a strong following have a major rival and a really good marketing team that creates a very distinct brand. The Cowboys, for example, became known as “America’s Team” expanding their presence outside the Dallas area. Similarly, KU often refers to alumni with the phrase “Once a Jayhawk, always a Jayhawk,” continuing to reinforce the connection to the university.

 

Application

 

These concepts of connecting apply elsewhere. Think of the places you eat, the politicians you want to elect, the products you buy (or dream of buying), etc. In each case, consider how they are building their connection to you. Does it feel authentic? How strong would you rate your loyalty? Are you a strong fan through thick and thin or are you a fair weather fan?

 

By considering these questions, you can learn a lot about both yourself and the things that attract you.

 

 

Out of Sight - Out of Mind

 

The age-old saying “Out of sight, out of mind” is a reflection of how easy it is to disconnect from people, places and things. It is easy to feel a connection when you are physically in the presence of someone or something, or when looking at a photograph. However, it isn’t always so easy to feel that connection at other times.

 

Physical Presence

 

When you are with friends enjoying a meal on a restaurant patio looking out toward the mountains, it is easy to feel a connection to your friends, the restaurant, and the mountains. Likewise, you may see a vase or other item that your mother owns and think about memories you have when that vase sat on your grandmother’s table. This gives you a feeling of connection to both the vase and your grandmother. Likewise, you may fall in love with Rome when you visit, feel strong emotion toward a co-worker, or have a strong desire to purchase something that catches your eye.

 

Physically Disconnected

 

On the other hand, it is often far more difficult to feel this deep of a connection at a distance. A restaurant that you have never eaten at is simply a restaurant. Similarly, a vase that you have only heard about or seen in photographs is simply a vase. It might be intriguing because it belonged to your grandmother and you may be interested in it. However, it is not the same as if you have memories of it. Likewise, photos and videos of Rome may pull you into its charm. However, it is different than when you have a personal connection and memories after visiting the city.

 

This is why it is easiest to have emotions and empathy toward people you know personally. You may have emotions and empathy for others, but it is not the same as when you have a strong personal connection. Shared experiences and memories are driving factors in creating strong personal bonds.

 

Out of Sight

 

Now, what may be a very strong connection today can lose that connect when you are somewhere else, with other people, or not looking at an object. In some cases, these people, places, and things may come in and out of your conscious mind on a regular basis. In other cases, your memory may not be jogged until someone or something is mentioned. Or, alternately, you may only think of them when you next see them.

 

In these cases, you are not maintaining strong connections with these people, places, and things. When they are out of sight, they are out of mind.

 

Why?

 

A good question to ask yourself is “What have I put out of my mind?” You might want to ask yourself if there is a particular reason why you have placed that person, place, or object at a distance despite feeling a strong connection to it each time you are together.

 

Consider what things tend to slip your mind. Perhaps you occasionally talk to a friend and each time you talk about how you need to get together sometime. You plan to call and make arrangements, but it doesn’t happen. This would be a prime candidate for a person who falls into the “Out of sight, out of mind” category. Similarly, if every time you see a piece of art, you say to yourself, “I am going to save up so I can purchase that,” but then you go back to your life and forget about it until you see it again, it is also in this category. You feel a pull, but it isn’t strong enough to make you act.

 

So, are you forgetting someone, some place, or something? If so, what are you missing out on because you aren’t keeping your connection to them or it in your conscious mind?

 

 

Connecting to Your Desires

 

It is easy to say that your job, current relationship, or life in general isn’t satisfying. However, it is often far more challenging to define what it is that you truly desire.

 

Connecting with that part of us that brings pure joy is extremely rewarding, but often difficult to achieve. Sometimes we have spent so much time taking care of the chores of life that we don’t even know if we can feel joy. Other times we aren’t sure that we are worthy of joy. And, in other situations, we know what we think brings us joy, but we may be completely off base.

 

Connecting to Joy

 

The first step in connecting with what you really want is to give yourself permission to feel joy and to do something that you truly desire. This includes removing the words “can’t,“ “should,“ and “but” from your vocabulary. Replace them with phrases, such as, “I desire,” “I have always dreamed of,” and “I feel joy when.”

 

The second step is to step into the energy of joy. Feel it. Experience it. Live it. Then look around and see what is part of that world. It is the things that exist in a big way in that world that are the things that you truly desire in your life.

 

Surprises

 

You may be surprised by what you experience. That large screen TV that you thought was so important may not even exist in the world of joy. If it does, it may be secondary to other things.

 

A TV may seem superficial, but the same concept applies to what you believe is your life’s work, your stated dreams, and/or your goals. What you may have, for years, believed was important may actually not be something that brings you true joy. Therefore, when you step into joy, you may be surprised to see yourself doing something very different.

 

You may also be surprised if you have trained yourself to believe that you have no passion or that nothing exists that would actually bring you joy. When you step forward, you may be excited to find yourself actually experiencing joy. The activities or interests that popped into your mind may seem to have just appeared from out of a void.

 

Feeling Worthy

 

The third step in connecting with what you truly desire is to feel worthy of the joy it brings. For some people, this is the hardest step. If you are one of them, you may consciously or subconsciously know what you want. However, you may find it difficult to take steps toward manifesting your dreams.

 

If you experience this challenge, consider if you feel that you deserve joy. Consider if there is any underlying fear of being happy. If you find yourself in this situation, work must be done regarding self-esteem and personal power before you will be able to embrace your passion and experience true joy. All the dreaming in the world and the most fantastic goals will not move you forward if you don’t believe you deserve joy.

 

The fourth step in connecting with what you truly desire is to take action! Take steps, no matter how small, toward your dream. It is only through action that your dream can come true!

 

Start today by stepping into joy!

 

 

 

So often people talk of change without really thinking about the effort they must make to create change. In many cases, the change they desire is simply wishful thinking. The person wants a job that pays more, a new relationship, to travel, or to spend more time with family. However, they simply want them without being willing to make an effort to bring those things into their lives.

 

In many cases, these goals are achievable. However, they will not magically happen without focus and effort.

 

Making Space

 

Generally, if you want to add or change something to your life, you have to have room for that person, activity, etc. It is very much like a shelf. If you have a shelf that is completely packed with items, you can’t add another item to the shelf without removing something. The same is true with life in general.

 

Making space can relate to making physical space, but it can also include making time, being emotionally open, and having a willingness to accept new ideas.

 

What Is Serving You

 

The first thing to do is to survey your life and determine which objects, activities, etc. are still serving you and which are not. For example, if you want a new relationship, you may want to survey your home for items related to an ex. It is also important to ensure that you have mental and emotional space for a new relationship. Ask yourself, “What am I holding onto that relates to my ex?” Follow it with the simple question, “Why am I holding onto it?”

 

Likewise, if you want to pursue a hobby, but don’t ever seem to have the time, look at where you are spending your time. Clearly, there are some things that have to be done, but many things are not required. Do you really need to be on the PTA? Can you get someone to assist with the family reunion? Do you really need to watch so much TV? All these questions help you identify what is important to you. If the ways you are spending your time are all more important to you than the hobby you desire, you need to realize that it is your choice to do those things instead of the hobby.

 

Removing Unneeded Connections

 

Once you have identified those things that need change in order for you to change, it is important to remove or alter the connection with those items. For instance, if you have a chair that your ex bought, you might simply decide to sell or donate the chair to remove the energy of your ex. However, you may love that chair and need it for seating. In this case, it may be more practical to do an energy clearing or to transform the chair in some way. Painting, reupholstering, or even moving the chair may help in changing the energy of the chair.

 

The most important thing, however, is to ensure that you view the chair differently. If you still think of your ex every time you sit in it, you have not yet removed the connection to your ex. It is important to release your ex and begin seeing the chair as simply your chair.

 

Likewise, you need to make room emotionally for a new person. If you are always thinking about how things were with your ex, there will be no room for anyone new. An excellent way to achieve the release of old emotions is to recognize what positive your gained from the relationship, whether the relationship was good or bad. Show gratitude for those positive things and then simply release the person. There are several ways this can be achieved and you may even have your own ritual that you would like to use to release old, unneeded emotions.

 

Building New Connections

 

Once you ensure that you have room in your life for that which you desire, it is important to start building connections toward your desired outcome. In the case of relationships, this can include taking action to go out and meet people, joining an on-line dating service, or making sure that you are in the best shape you can be. All these things start to build connections toward supporting a new relationship.

 

In the case of a new job, you might simply update your resume, start scanning the internet for job openings, and start talking to friends about your desire for a new job. These actions send messages out to the Universe allowing the Universe to assist in creating the ultimate connection that you desire.

 

If you are truly committed to change and you follow these steps, you may be surprised at what will change in your life!

 

If you need assistance making space in your life for change, contact us. We offer several services that assist with this process.