staying connected during social distancing

Staying connected with friends and family is often a challenge. However, it is more important than ever at this time. Yet, the challenges are even greater with the recommendation/requirement of widespread social distancing.

 

Social Distancing

 

“Social Distancing” is a bit of a misnomer. The intent of social distancing isn’t to distance yourself from others socially. Instead, the idea is to distance yourself from others physically. Staying connected to family and friends while distancing yourself physically is actually very important during this time of isolation.

 

People are not intended by their very nature to be alone as humans are social beings and require human contact. The amount of contact varies with extroverts needing contact with more people than introverts. However, introverts still need contact, but usually thrive best when in contact with a small circle of friends and family.

 

During a time when most people are spending a majority of time at home, extra non-physical contact can boost the energy of the people involved. It not only helps boost the energy and health of the person you contact, but also does the same for you.

 

Reaching Out

 

Often we get busy and don’t connect with friends and family as often as we plan. For many of us, this is an opportunity to reach out to friends and family more often. It is especially important for older people and people who live alone to continue to have human interaction. Thus, if you are able, contact them electronically each and every day.

 

Contacts with others do not have to require a lot of time. It can be a quick text, email, Facebook message, or other “text” style conversation. However, there is nothing like hearing someone else’s voice, especially for older people who may struggle with technology. So, if you can, give someone a quick call. Additionally, technology, such as, Skype, Zoom, and Facetime, allow you to see each other, which adds a bit more to the level of connection.

Focus of Conversations

 

You should make sure that loved ones are aware of the latest information on the situation and the steps that they should be taking. However, for the most part conversations should be fun and upbeat. Focusing on good things will help you, too.

 

Sometimes topics of discussion can be a challenge when everyone is spending time at home and haven’t been anywhere or done anything. To combat this issue, think of topics ahead of time. You can consult the World Wide Web for ideas as there are lists for everything. However, a good place to start is asking the other person about a hobby or something that they do which you know little about. For older family members, ask them about their childhood, their parents, their siblings, eras gone by, etc.

 

Staying connected is the only way to go – even with social distancing! Stay connected at a distance! Be well and help others be well!

 

 

We have a list of Resources for managing through the current situation.  They include links to official information, healing/energy work sources, online activities, educational material, tips for working from home, and much more.  Click here to access the list of Resources.

 

 

Focus on what is under your control

The world today is challenging all of us. For most of us in the United States, we are accustomed to being able to do what we want, go where we want, and live in any fashion that we choose. By standards of yesteryear and even many countries today, we live in luxury. And, most people here have never experienced restrictions on our freedom. Now, we are facing a time where restrictions limit us. In that light, each of us must focus on what we can control.

 

The Great Depression & WWII

 

The last time there were significant nationwide restrictions on Americans was during World War II. Most of the people that experienced the days of the Great Depression and WWII are no longer with us. Only the few remaining members of the Greatest Generation remember those days. It is from them that we can get some perspective on the situation we are facing today.

 

Availability of Items

 

The challenges of the Great Depression and WWII were different than the challenge we face today. Still, there are some commonalities. During the 1930s and 1940s, the government rationed items because we could not get items, such as, sugar and coffee in a big enough supply for everyone to have as much as they desired. Other items, such as, shoes were rationed to save materials for the war. An important factor is that this wasn’t for a couple of months. These restrictions went on for several years, although some were eased over time.

 

Today items, such as, toilet paper and hand sanitizer are difficult to find in stores. However, the reasons are different. It isn’t that we can’t get materials to make them or that they are needed for another reason. Instead, they are scarce because of panic buying and in some cases hoarding with the idea of profiting off of the situation.

 

The availability of most items should return to normal shortly as people see that supplies are replenished and opportunists find that selling these items more difficult than they imagined due to rules put in place by online marketplaces. To assist with the situation, stores have begun rationing the number of some items that an individual can purchase at a given time until people return to normal purchasing patterns.

 

You can’t control what is on the shelves, but you can ensure that you buy only what you need. Perhaps consider a few extra items so that you have to shop less often, but don’t over do it. Consider how long it will take you to use the items you purchase. The less we all panic buy, the less likely we will have new restrictions on our freedom to purchase items of our choosing.

 

Restaurants and Bars

 

During the war, restaurants stayed open in most areas. However, some had limited hours. Likewise, in some areas nightlife was put on hold by local governments. The reasoning being that it was wrong for people to have fun while our soldiers were risking their lives. Yet, theaters were still open and people did get a burger and fries now and then.

 

Today, restaurants and bars are closed or have limited take-out and delivery services not because it wouldn’t look right, but instead to curb the transmission of COVID-19. One huge difference is that today people eat out far more than they did 80 years ago.

 

Eating out is a habit and some people do it daily. Thus, it seems like a much bigger issue to most people today than it was in 1940. This restriction on our freedom seems to some as overwhelming. If you are one of them, I recommend learning to cook (if you don’t know how), spending time with your family, learning about something you are interested in, or doing some other home activity that you enjoy. If you are an extrovert, talk on the phone, have group chats, email, message, and use social media sites to stay in contact.

 

Businesses

 

Already gyms, restaurants, museums, theaters, and other businesses have had their doors closed or their business greatly altered by government rules. Additionally, there are rumors that some businesses will be asked (or told) to convert to making medical supplies. This type of thing did happen during WWII. Businesses had no choice. The government told them what they would be making and the timeline they had to make it.

 

We aren’t accustomed to the government dictating the closure of businesses or what businesses can and cannot do. However, the longer this outbreak goes on, the more likely business decisions will be controlled by the government. Still, it doesn’t mean that it will be forever. As WWII ramped down, businesses returned to making the products they had made before the war almost overnight. In some cases, the first new civilian products rolled off the assembly lines the same day the restriction was lifted.

 

Travel Restrictions

 

People travel much more today than they did in the 1930s and 1940s. People fly at the drop of a hat, cruise on the oceans, and drive across the country without it being a big deal. It was just a part of life up until the last few weeks when travel restrictions started being put in place.

 

Travel restrictions today are a bit different than during WWII. During WWII, people weren’t technically restricted from travel. However, gas rationing made it nearly impossible to travel. And, if you blew a tire, you probably weren’t getting a new one for a long time, as they required government approval to purchase. Likewise, you had to have government approval to purchase a car or a tractor. Fortunately, we haven’t reached that point.

 

Travel may be greatly restricted right now. So, what can we do? Travel online. Research places that you would like to someday visit, find museum collections online, share stories of previous travel, etc. Use technology to bring travel and exotic places into your life.

 

Focus On What We Can Control

 

The government may control many aspects of life, however, they don’t control everything. Thus, it is important for each of us to focus on what we can control. We cannot control that we can’t hang out at our favorite restaurant. However, if we can afford it, we can still order take out. We can also experiment with making new kinds of food, try new hobbies, etc.

 

We don’t have to allow restrictions on our freedoms to lead to negative thinking. By focusing on what is under your control, we will keep a positive mindset and make it through this situation better people than we were before. We have the Greatest Generation as our role model. Make them proud.

 

Join us March 26 as we discuss Being In Control In Uncertain Times.  The event is FREE.

 

 

Deciding to heal

 

 

By the time most people are adults they have likely encountered multiple physical, emotional, and mental struggles – a broken bone, a lost loved one, or stress over school. Most of what is experienced is temporary. Broken bones, for example, heal with time. Meanwhile, school assignments come and go, leaving a void to be filled. It is the emotional hurt that often presents the most challenges to healing.

 

Emotional trauma isn’t fleeting nor can one define how long an individual will require to heal from it. If a person doesn’t heal from grief, for example, they may suffer the rest of their lives over the loss of a parent, child, spouse, or sibling. The same is true of other types of emotional trauma, such as, a parent instilling guilt into their child in an effort to get the child to do what the parent desires.

 

Not only does emotional trauma not heal overnight, it can manifest as physical ailments. For example, some people suffer from stress headaches because they feel that they can never be good enough to meet other people’s expectations. Likewise, some people have pain in their neck and shoulders from figuratively carrying the weight of the world on their shoulder (i.e. feeling too much responsibility). Additionally, there have been some studies that correlate emotional trauma with the manifestation of illnesses, such as cancer, where the disease manifests a couple years after the person experiences trauma.

 

Making the Decision to Heal

 

There have been a number of cases where someone is diagnosed with a condition, sometimes life threatening, where the patient sets a strong intention to heal. These people may experience improvement in their health despite a dim prognosis and some may experience complete healing. Not everyone experiences miraculous healing; however, there are enough cases that show healing is possible if someone sets a true intent to heal.

 

Deciding to heal is more than a person making an implicit or explicit statement that they have decided to heal. There has to be true intent to heal that involves having the emotional desire and the belief that healing is possible coupled with taking physical actions to heal. This is true whether the condition is a physical, emotional, or mental ailment. Healing from emotional grief, for example, means that you physically return to doing some activity that you love.

 

Healing In Action

 

I personally know several people that have made an intention to heal, including myself. In my case, I had a stroke, but I simply believed I would heal. I didn’t consider any other options despite the opinions of the medical professionals. Someone else in my situation, might have just accepted the medical professionals’ opinions and given up or become depressed. However, I just ignored their prognosis and kept working to heal. Today, I am not 100% of what I was before the stroke, but I am doing far better than the doctors believed I would be.

 

In another case, an acquaintance was diagnosed with a tumor. After receiving her diagnosis, she decided to heal by using her gifts in energy healing. She was not able to completely remove the tumor. However, with her effort, the tumor shrank and moved away from critical organs, making it less risky to remove.

 

In another miraculous case, an acquaintance was nearly unable to leave her home because of multiple medical conditions. After she decided she couldn’t live that way, she started getting intuitive hints as to what to do to help her condition. She used nutrition and energy work to completely change her life. Her illness has been in remission for several years and her doctors are completely baffled.

 

Taking Shortcuts

 

In our desire to heal quickly, sometimes we attempt to take shortcuts. A person who experienced the loss of a loved one, for example, may continue their daily routines and deny the emotions they are feeling. On the surface, it may appear that the person moved quickly through the grieving process and has moved on with their life. On the inside, however, the person may be carrying around an emotional pressure cooker. A minor upset may trigger the person to explode with emotions that would seem excessive for the situation. In this case, the person did not truly heal, but simply ignored the healing process.

 

The same could be applied to physical rehab and mental health. I’m sure we all know someone who had a physical injury and returned to their activities too soon and ended up aggravating the injury. This is really what happened in the case of emotional trauma. The person returned to normal life too quickly and aggravated the trauma making it worse than it would have been had they worked through the grieving process.

 

Taking Action In Your Life

 

Survey yourself to see if there are any issues or past traumas – physical, emotional, or mental – that require healing. Recognizing there is an issue is the first step in beginning the process of true healing.

 

Now, imagine what your life would be like if you truly healed. Envision that issue completely gone from your life. If that is something that you would like to experience, you can set an intent to heal. Remember that you must have both the desire to heal and the belief that you can heal.

 

Once you are truly committed to healing, take actions for healing. Let your intuition and your heart guide you as you work toward a healthy you. With true intent and continual effort you will have the opportunity to experience a more fulfilling and joyful life.

 

The Art of Forgiveness

 

 

It is easy to gripe and complain about everything from work to family stresses to world politics. However, it is much more gratifying to seek out the good in everyone and everything along your path. It is easy to say, “But, so many things really are wrong with the world” or “Nobody gives good service” or “This person isn’t pulling their weight.” All of these things may be true, but seeing all the negative in the world serves no purpose.

 

Implications

 

This does not imply in any way that you do something reckless. You can’t  just assume the other person is a good person. You still need to be aware of your surroundings and follow your intuition about people and situations. However, it does directly imply that you should look for a speck of optimism in the most hopeless situations.  Likewise, your should find something positive to hold onto in everything – even bad experiences.

 

Experimenting

 

Try experimenting with looking for something good, positive, or optimistic. Start with simple easy situations. When a restaurant’s service is slow, don’t grumble and complain. Instead, realize that you are being given time to enjoy your companions. Alternately, if you are alone, you can spend the time relaxing. 

 

If you are in a rush and this happens, realize that you may be getting the message to slow down. You can also consider that perhaps you are learning that this restaurant is not a place to go for a quick meal, which may be useful information in the future.

 

Likewise, try giving a positive word or a smile to people that you encounter. Smiling and saying, “Hello” costs no more than scowling and ignoring people. That word or smile may make the other person’s day and it is guaranteed that acting in a negative way will do nothing to benefit anyone – especially you.

 

Additionally, notice small things (and big things) that people do – mowing the lawn, helping with a problem, cooking dinner, or taking out the trash. These are all positive things in the world. When you really look for the positive, the world changes into a much better place than it seems if you let all the negativity overwhelm you.

 

Transformation

 

As you find more and more positive things in the world, you may find yourself transforming from a critic to a cheerleader. You will find yourself expressing gratitude more often, you will be on the receiving end of more smiles, and will find more and more positive things in the world. Most of all, when you replace a negative thought, action, or word with a positive one, your energy level is raised and your heart is satisfied.

 

behind the facade

 

 

As a child, my mother insisted that we keep the drapes closed at all times. I assume she was worried about protecting the family since she was a single working mother. My dad had died just after my sixth birthday. Therefore, I don’t really remember if she had a similar concern when he was alive.

 

All I know is that she never wanted anyone to see into the house. This became readily apparent one beautiful day when I dared to open the living room drapes. I was severely reprimanded as soon as my mom arrived home.

 

Of course, she also never wanted to be seen by anyone when she wasn’t looking her best. I assumed it was partially because she wanted to be attractive to men. Thus, she was always looking her best when she went anywhere.

 

Others Are Judging

 

Later, I realized that these behaviors were tied, in part, to her belief that she knew how others were judging her. Thus, she felt compelled to show people what she thought they wanted to see so that they would think highly of her. She was concerned with what others thought of her and made sure to show them what she believed they wanted to see. When she wasn’t prepared to show that image, she wanted to remain hidden.

 

I believe everyone does this to some extent.  Most of us put on our best business look for job interviews, are just a bit sweeter than normal when talking to a new love interest, and act a bit different at church than at home. However, there are those that rarely show their authentic self. Instead, they hide behind a façade of what they think people want to see. Those are the ones that are perpetually disconnected.

 

Some of those people end up feeling as if they have lost their identity. They may go through life without ever acknowledging their own value. These types of people constantly put others first and are often everyone’s go to person when they need something. Yet, these people often do not feel valued.

 

Hiding The True Self

 

Other people hide behind the façade as an escape from reality. For instance, a woman may not feel beautiful, thus, she will over-beautify herself. Similarly, a man may feel that he isn’t as good a provider as he believes he should be. In that situation, he may exaggerate his job responsibilities and income.

 

Others have, for one reason or another, come to believe that others’ views of them is critically important to their success and worth to society. These people often create judgments of themselves and attribute them to others. If they actually bothered to have a conversation and learn about other people’s perspectives, they might learn that the people that they are trying so hard to impress, don’t actually have the judgments that they believe they do.

 

Being Authentic

 

A person needs to show their authentic self in order to connect. Hiding behind facades prevents true connections.

 

In our next article “To Judge and Be Judged,” we will discuss the phenomena of people that judge they are being judged.

 

 

 

Whether or not you believe in the Bible and the end of the world as described in Revelations, one must be amused at the people who believe they can predict the exact day and time that the world will end. So far, each one has been a complete failure.

 

The Changing Story

 

The funniest of all are those who change their story as their predicted end of the world date approaches or passes. They have found a slight miscalculation or new information that reframes the actual end to a date five, ten, or fifteen years into the future.

 

Yet, there are many people who are not extremists that believe they see signs that the world is ending. This has happened throughout history. Like the predictions from fanatics, these signs have proven not to be actual signs over and over again.

 

Patterns

 

The question is, “Why do people continue to see these signs?” The answer is simple. People are creators of patterns and see patterns everywhere. Where patterns do not exist or are not obvious, people use their creative mind to invent patterns. Therefore, when events happen in the world, it is easy for those focused on the Bible and Revelations in particular to select events from the world that “match” the events described in the Bible verses.

 

The Signs

 

Wars, volcanoes, storms, and more can easily be interpreted to be the signs that are described within the Bible. But are they? And, does it matter?

 

I am not a Bible expert, but as a thinking person, I have to wonder why one volcano or series of volcanoes would be a sign of the end of times, but another volcano would not. We know that they have been happening throughout time and clearly the world has not ended. However, one website indicates that the end of times started in 1914. They don’t speculate, however, on when the world will actually end. Obviously,

 

The second question has an obvious answer. No, it does not matter if these events are signs of the end of the world or not. If people see parallels and that somehow changes their life, they are making a choice. Their choice has nothing to do with the actual end of the world. It simply means that something triggered that person to live their life differently. It may make the person’s life better or worse depending on the choices that they made.

 

Parallels

 

If there are signs that the world is ending and we totally ignore them that is okay, too. People can and will find parallels between current events and the end of the world. They will also find parallels between the death of President Kennedy and President Lincoln. Likewise, parallels can be drawn between ancient Rome and the U.S.A. today.

 

Choices

 

In reality, life is about choices. You can find connections or parallels between ANY two events happening today or at any time in history. The question is, “Are you going to choose to pay attention to those parallels or not?” And, if so, “What life choices are you going to make? Are they going to improve your life and the lives of others?”

 

 

 

It is common to hear people say how important it is to let negative emotions go. But, most people are challenged to actually make it happen. They believe in the concept, but making it a reality is lots of work and requires a lot of determination and self-love.

 

Besides being generally happier, letting go of toxic relationships and emotions is good for a person’s long-term physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health. Yet, people often harbor negative emotions regarding a person, company, or situation for days, weeks, months, and even years. If not released, negativity accumulates and strengthens. It can affect a person in many different ways including manifesting as physical ailments.

 

Now, what if you have harbored negative feelings about a person for years and you find that you are genetically related to that person? Learning of this connection can be devastating to people.

 

Consider the situation where there was a friend of the family that you just couldn’t stand being around when you were growing up. You couldn’t put your finger on it, but you just felt disgust toward this man. Over the years, you could never manage to let it go. Later, you find out that he was once your mother’s boyfriend and he is indeed your birth father instead of the man you call Dad.   Learning your birth father isn’t the person you thought is crushing. However, it is even more difficult when you find that your real birth father is someone you harbor negative feelings towards.

 

Alternately, you could have had a rough breakup. You haven’t been able to have a good relationship since the breakup. You can’t get over the pain of the relationship. The mere thought of your ex still makes your gut churn. Then, one day, you are doing genealogy and discover that your ex is actually a distant cousin. It is like a two by four just hit you, deepening your wound. Not only did this person leave you wounded, they are also related to you.

 

Perhaps even worse would be the discovery that you are genetically related to someone you have not forgiven for physical or mental harm they did to someone you love. You may have spent years being angry at this person for a serious crime like assault, rape, or murder. To find you are related to them feels as if your soul is being ripped out.

 

Learning of these connections can be challenging in the best of circumstances. However, being in a good place emotionally can definitely make the news of the connection easier. A new connection may never be uncovered between you and someone you harbor negative feelings towards. However, if it is, being in a good place emotionally is essential.

 

We all know that we need to get rid of the negativity in our lives and this is just one more reason to do it. If you think it can’t happen to you, you might be surprised. These examples are generalizations based on real situations that have happened.

 

While you are clearing out this negativity, give yourself permission to release the negativity you have toward people who you already know are your genetic connections. If you have anger toward your siblings, parent, or others, know that holding onto it serves no purpose.

 

Remember, you are all related. For instance, if you are angry at your mother, consider that she not only gave you life, but you also share about 50% of your DNA with her (yeah I know, you didn’t get THAT DNA). Therefore, being angry with your mother is a bit like being angry at part of yourself. That should make you want to release the anger; however, many people spend lots of time being angry with themselves.

 

If you find yourself having negative feelings toward yourself, start by releasing those feelings. Nothing can be more impacting to you than positive or negative feelings toward yourself. Know that you do not have to hold onto negative feelings.  With work, they can be replaced with feelings of love and kindness.

 

Once you conquer the challenge of releasing negativity toward yourself, branch out to your family, friends, and even those who have wronged you. Although you may never uncover an unknown genetic connection, letting go of the negativity ensures that such a discovery would be easier to handle.

 

No matter your situation, letting go of negative emotions will have a positive impact on your life. Releasing negativity is healthy and it allows you to move forward with your life.

 

So, stay positive! You never know where it will lead in life.